FUNNY sms

Tuesday, August 5, 2008

1.Biwi(Ghusse Main):
Tumhare Dimagh Main To
Sirf Gobar Hi Bhara Hai..!!

Husband (Pyar Se):
To Phr Itni Dyer Se Kha Q Rahi Ho….??????




2.Wife came home with a goat.
Husband asked”Is bhains ko ghar kion lai ho?”
Wife:”Dikhta nahin, bakri hy!”
Husband:”Bakri se hi poch raha hon”




3.Husband wife mein ladai hoi,
Husband ghar se chala gaya,

Husb:Rat ko phone pay,”Khanay mein kya hai”
Wife:Zeher.
Husb:Mai dair se aonga, tum kha kar so jana:D




4.Girl:Me tumse shadi nahi ker sakti
isliye ye lo apne love letters
or mere mujhe wapis karo!

Boy bari c basket samne rakhte howay,
Is me se jo jo tumharay hain nikal lo! :D




5.A sardar prays daily for 2 hours,
“Hey vaheguru meri lottery lagady.”

After 11 years VaheGuru angrily appeared
& said,”Khoti de putar 1 vari ticket te le ley”




6.Man standing on the scale,
holding his stomach in.
Wife:I do not think that is going to help.
Man:Sure it does. How else could I see the numbers?????




7.Soldier:Sir, we are surrounded!
Major:Excellent!
We can attack in any direction now!!!!!




8.A man sees a fat man
sitting in a train cabin.

Taunting, he asks:
Is this cabin for elephants only!

Fat man humbly replies:
No!Even monkeys like you can sit!!!!




9.Ek admi aadi raat ko apni moti biwi se bola
k sisak sisak ke marna theek hai ya ek dum.
BIWI : Ek dum.
Aadmi : To apni dusri tang bhi mujh per rakh do.......




10.Wife:”
Mujhe kisi mehangi jaga le ke chaliye na ji”
.
.
.
Husband:Chalo, tayyar ho jao…”
.
.
.
.
.
Petrol pump chaltay hain:D





11.A boy goes to see a dance.

His mom angrily asks him:
Did u see anything there that
u were not supposed to see?

Boy: yes, I saw dad!!!!!!!!




12.News reporter:
KHAN SAAB ye batain k plateform
par kharay saray pathan kaisay maray?
Pathan: aik elan hua k train plateform per aa rahi hai,
sub ne patri par chalang laga di.
Reporter:Phir aap kaisay buch gaye?
Pathan:main khudkushi k liye patri per leta tha,
ye elan suna to main plateform per ja ker lait gaya:)






13.Aaj “TOM & JERRY” ki barsi hai
un ki yaad mein
plz ye SMS kam se kum kisi
1 “CARTOON” ko zaroor send karo,
me ne apna farz pura ker dia.
ab aap ki baari hay........




14.Boy:I love u
Girl:Me too
Boy:Tum mujhe kitna pyar karti ho?
Girl:Jitna tum mujhe karte ho
Boy: U cheater..
main samjha tum waqai mujh se pyar karti ho.......




15.Kid:Aunty, mummy ne chini mangi hai.

Aunty chini daitay howa,
“acha aur kia kaha mummy nay?”

Kid:Agar woh kamini na de,
to Pinki aunty se lay aana...




16.Pundit:-Tumhare jeevan me 6 larkian ayengi.
Bow:Wow, kia bat hai.
Pandit:Ziada khush hone ki baat nahin hai.
1 ghar wali or 5 betiyan hain :)




17.1 Boy:Yar larkion ko “I love you”
kehnay ki sub se achi jaga kon si hai?
2 boy:Mazaar
1Boy:woh kion?
2boy:kion k wahan unke paon mein chappal nahin hoti.




18.Boy friend is fun,
&
Husband is gun,

Boy friend is light of moon,
&
Husband is month of june,

Boy friend is tooty fruity,
&
Husband is qismat phooti.....




19.Lovers sitting in a park,
boy tries to kiss the girl..
Girl says No dear not all this before marriage..
Boy: Don’t worry darling “I am already married”.:p




20.Interviewer:what is skeleton?
Sardar:Sir, skeleton is a person
who started dieting but forgot to stop it..!!!




21.Once there was a mirror which used to kill “LIERS”
FRENCH:I think I don’t smoke (killed)
AMERICAN:I think, I love Iraq(killed)
PATHAN:I think (killed)...




22.1 sardar rail ki patri per sogaya.
1 admi ne kaha kia ker raho ho?
Train aayegi tu mar jao gay!
Sardar:Mairy oper se jahaz guzar gaya
tu kuch nahin howa, rail kia cheez hay????




23.Impact of Movies:

Teacher :- Who is Mahatma Gandhi?

Student:- He is the one who helped
Munna Bhai to impress his girlfriend!!!!




24.Police:Tumhe kal subah 5 baje phasi di jayegi.
Sardar: Ha Ha Ha Ha!
Police:Kion has rahe ho?
Sardar:Main to uthta hi subha 9 baje hon.!
hehehe:d




25.Judge:why did u shoot ur wife
instead of shootingher lover?

Sardar:Your honour,
it’s easier to shoot a woman once,
than shooting one man every week.




26.Father asked beti:
“Tum bari ho ker kia karo gi?”

Beti:”
Maa banun gi,
study karon gi,
shari karon gi,
bus or kia?”

Mom:”Beti jo marzi kerna per zara tarteeb seedhi rakhna”;-)





27.In bio practical:
Examiner:Tell me the name of
this bird by seeing it’s legs only?
Sardar:I don’t know.
Examiner:You failed, what’s your name?
Sardar:See my legs & tell my name...




28.1st ever intelligent sardar.

Teacher: what do u call a person
who cannot hear anything?

sardar: u can call him anything,
because he cannot hear anything:-)






29.Doctor:
Ye syrup 2 spoon subha,
2 dopahar,
2 raat ko,
3 din tuk lena hay

Pathan:apna dawai apna pas rakho
hamara ghar me itna chamach(spoon) nahi hy.





30.100 pathan aik kashti me sawar thay
k achanak kashti ruk gai
.
.
.
or
.
.
.
sab doob gaye, kaisay?
.
.
.
pathan thay na sub,
dhakka deney utar gaye
:p